Tigers and Cookies

Me: Put down the cookie and eat some fruit instead
18 yr old child: You can't tell me what to do my whole life
11yr old child: Yeah, Mama, you can't tell us what to do.
Me: (pulling t-shirt up and exposing stomach covered in stretch marks, I point to them. ) See these? I paid for the right to boss you around. I earned it!
Both children cringing: Ok Ok, you are right! You get to boss us!
(child puts down cookie and gets an apple)


And so order is re-established in the House On Clover Ridge!